HIRED GUNS

Erik Jensen
Erik Jensen began committing artistic larceny after happening upon an uneaten Hardee’s Mushroom & Swiss Burger, a stack of foot porn, and 14 dog-eared issues of CREEM under his cousin’s bed in Green Bay, Wisconsin. Erik made the mistake of stealing the latter, and thus began his journey to cowriting (with wife Jessica Blank, who has magnificent arches) and starring in the Lester Bangs play How to Be a Rock Critic. Jensen was eventually relegated to the world of prestige TV and now chomps a cigar while building castles for his children out of bundles of hundred-dollar bills.

See: Of Pop and Pies and Fun, page 82