One of the biggest problems with being a critic is that people are always expecting you to have opinions about everything. Now I readily admit that, at least as far as this particular outpost of rock criticdom is concerned, the specific things that I’m often called upon to express my opinions about are often those that, in the course of a perhaps more “normal” existence, I probably wouldn’t bother with even a moment’s thought over, let alone the hour upon hour of serious brainwork that goes into formulating actual, serviceably dispensable opinions.

Not that I’m complaining, mind you. Most of the time, I don’t mind having to sit around trying to solve such deep mysteries as exactly what on earth actor/comedian Dick Shawn is doing in the latest Ratt video (Milton Berle couldn’t make the shoot this time? The bass player is a big fan of The producers?) or why there’s a new Rod Stewart video every month (at least it sure seems like it), while, say, Gordon Lightfoot never appears to make any (maybe Gordo’s being censored! Free Canada now!). And if it’s up to me to point out such fascinating items as the fact that Vinnie Vincent looks more like a girl without any makeup on than he ever did when his whole face was smothered with it, or that World Party’s Karl Wallinger bears enough of a resemblance to Dave DiMartino to finally explain why D.D. always harbored a special spot in his big heart for Wallinger’s old band, the Waterboys, well, I knew this job was dangerous when I took it.