Eleganza thinks Bruce Springsteen’s fab—that the incomparable energy and zest and passion that he brings to the concert stage justify his being thought of, along with Bob Dylan and Elvis Presley, as one of the three greatest American rock ’n’ rollers ever.

Examining the sleeve of his latest album, though, Eleganza is tormented by the realization that it’s high time The Boss quit looking like a grease monkey and started dressing in accordance with his stature as the greatest American rock ’n’ roll figure of the last quarter of the 20th century thus far.