CREEM DREEM
CARLENE CARTER
June 1, 1981
Well, howdy, y'all! I'm Miss Carlene— well, I reckon y'all kin call me jus' plain Carlene, now, huh?—an' I jus' wanna stop all them there rumors about what ah make mah hubby Nick do! Y'all know Nick, don't y'all, he's a rock star an' all, OK? Anyway, whoever out there's been tellin' tall tales about how I forced mah poor sweet hubby to produce mah latest record an' how ah've got 'im wrapped around mah li'l fingah an' all—well, ah jus' got this one message for y'all: I'LL DROP THIS PHONY ACCENT AND WRING YOUR CAPITALIST IMPERIAL NECKS IF YA DON'T CLAM UP!! NOW!! Now, uh, honey...wheah was ah?...