DRINK IT BEFORE IT BITES: CREEM’S GUIDE TO BEER

Quick—what's the national pastime? Baseball? Pinball? Drugs? Making faces back at the TV? No no, you silly gooses, it's getting loaded, falling down and puking on your shoes, or your friends' shoes if at all possible. And what's the favorite agent of lushhood? BEER of course, that golden nektar of stupidity; 22.7 gallons per person last year and growing. While that only makes us #14 on the world charts, I say screw all those Krauts and Aussies—the crud they drink tastes like something that was used hard and put away wet.

The big question facing the discriminating sudsucker is: which one will best help extend that beer bellv without applying a POLICE TOW sticker on your tongue? So us brewboos here at (what magazine is it this month? oh yeah—Scientific Burnout) decided to—heh heh—find out for you. Yet another Reader Service!