KISS KOMIX

Once upon a time, Darcy Q. Docile, a nice boy from a nice quaint Amish community near Intercourse, Pennsylvania, used to tell his mother, "I want to be a peanut when / grow up, Mama, because they're reeee-al oily!”

One day Mama and and Darcy went into Intercourse and somehow Darcy wandered away down a back alley, where he thought he detected his beloved oily fragrance. But it wasn't peanuts the little angel smelled. It was something else . . . There, in that back alley, just inside a door labelled "Stage Entrance" that was slightly ajar, Darcy saw what he had sniffed ... A SWEATING HEAVY SET MAN IN LEATHER PRANCING ABOUT ON A STAGE MAINTAINING LOUDLY THAT HE WAS NOTHING BUT A HOUND DOG!!! Darcy shrank from the awesome spectacle. He spat. He foamed. A most horrifying glazecameoverhis eyes. Darcy stood transformed, lust emanating from his virginal Amish thighs. And before merciful unconsciousness hit, Darcy's last thoughts were: ”1 don't want to be a peanut: I want a woman to sit on my face." Moments later, awaking in a pool of sticky stuff, Darcy vowed to forever protect himself and others from the dread Rock n‘ Roll that had so violently altered him. The grim purpose of his life was set . . .